It’s that time of year again! Department stores are advertising clothing sales, office supply stores are stocking up on books and pencils, and crossing guards are getting their reflector suits ready. It’s time to go back to school! Unfortunately, this time of year can also bring feelings of anxiety, stress and worry. This is totally normal. I still develop a pit in my stomach when I see back-to-school commercials and have a momentary panic attack as I wonder if I completed my summer reading book reports! Summer vacation is usually a time for play, relaxation and travel. Meanwhile school comes with a more rigid schedule paired with judgement, hustle and constant evaluation. This shift in routine almost inevitably results in feelings of apprehension, fear and anxiety.

How to help children overcome their back-to-school anxiety

The first step to addressing back-to-school jitters is to identify their presence. Anxiety can manifest itself in many ways. Younger children may have trouble separating from their parents or have a decrease in their appetite. Older kids may develop vague symptoms like stomach aches, fatigue or difficulty sleeping. Seeing these signs in your child should alert you to the possibility that they may be anxious about the upcoming school year.

Once identified, it’s important to have a conversation and validate your child’s feelings. Children often worry about things like fitting in, getting called on in class by the teacher or making new friends. Telling them that it is normal to have these feelings helps your child know that you understand how it can be difficult making the adjustment from summer to school life — and that is okay! Try not to patronize, but instead encourage ways a child can cope with their feelings. Deep breaths, counting backwards or reading a favorite book are excellent options to settle down a child’s mind. Additionally, focusing on positive things the child might enjoy about school can redirect their energy. Perhaps there’s a friend they haven’t seen in a while, or they’re excited about the possibility of meeting a new friend or they’re eager to learn about a new subject.

Certain activities can help reduce anxiety when those feelings start to creep in:

• For young children, unstructured playtime — meaning playing without someone telling them what to play or how to play — provides children with a lot of freedom to work through their feelings, which in turn reduces anxiety.
• Arranging playdates with school friends or visiting the school a few times before classes begin can remove unfamiliarity for children who are attending new schools.
• Because screen time has been implicated in increasing anxiety in children, particularly with the advent of more social media apps and internet use, it may be a good idea to limit screen time to avoid unnecessary challenges trying to address it once school is in session.
• For older children, building a connection by spending time as a family can be very helpful. Doing activities like having a picnic, playing a board game or taking a walk together as a family can establish a psychological bond during a tough time.

Another important thing to establish is the overall routine of the household. Predictability has been known to reduce anxiety, and it is no different with a child. Developing a consistent routine when it comes to wake up times, bedtime times, breakfast foods and overall timing of the day can help children to adjust to the schedule that is anticipated once the school year begins. This is generally best done one to two weeks before the first day of school.

While it is normal for kids to have a certain degree of back-to-school emotions, we must also recognize the difference between healthy nervousness and anxiety that is debilitating or severe enough to require professional help. After one or two weeks, a child should have had time to settle into the routine of the school year and symptoms of anxiety should begin to dissipate. Children who have persistent symptoms lasting into the fourth of fifth weeks of school may require a consultation with a mental health care provider to discuss more in-depth strategies that can help, including cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) and even medication.

I hope this upcoming year brings challenges that give your child the opportunity to exhibit their potential and allow them to grow into strong, healthy and resilient adults.