The college application process can be a stressful time for both teens and parents. As your child navigates this complex journey, it’s important to offer support and guidance in a balanced way. Here are some tips to help your teen manage stress and stay confident throughout the process:

  1. Keep communication open
  • Create a safe space: Encourage open and honest communication. Let your teen know that they can share their feelings, fears and frustrations without judgment.
  • Listen actively: Give your full attention when your student is talking. Avoid interrupting them and validate their emotions. Often, we want to jump to making things better, but this can be powerful to allow space for that feeling. So instead of saying “Don’t worry!”, try saying “That sounds so stressful that you’re worried about what will happen. I am confident you can face these feelings and I’m here to support you!”
  • Ask open-ended questions: Instead of asking “How was your day?”, try “What was the most challenging part of your day? The best part?” This can help them open up and share more details.
  1. Set realistic expectations
  • Avoid unrealistic goals: Don’t pressure your teen to apply to a certain number of schools or aim for specific colleges.
  • Focus on the process: Emphasize the importance of the application process itself, rather than just the outcome.
  • Celebrate small wins: Acknowledge their hard work and effort, even for small accomplishments.
  1. Encourage self-care
  • Prioritize sleep: Make sure your student gets enough sleep each night to maintain focus and energy.
  • Focus on healthy eating: Provide a balanced diet to fuel their body and mind.
  • Get regular exercise: Remind your teen that physical activity can help reduce stress and improve mood.
  • Practice mindfulness techniques: Encourage your teen to try relaxation techniques like deep breathing, meditation or yoga.
  1. Limit screen time
  • Do a digital detox: Encourage breaks from screens, especially before bed.
  • Practice mindful social media use: Help your teen set limits on social media to avoid comparison and anxiety.
  1. Offer practical support
  • Help with logistics: Assist with tasks like proofreading essays, researching colleges and filling out applications. Don’t forget to ask if they want that help! Sometimes teens just want to know that they are on track through some positive, labeled praise.
  • Encourage time management: Help your teen create a study schedule to help them balance their workload.
  • Seek professional help: If your teen is experiencing significant stress or anxiety, consider consulting with a therapist or counselor.

By following these tips, you can help your teen navigate the college application process with confidence and resilience. Remember, the goal is to support them, not control them. Let them take the lead and be there to offer guidance and encouragement every step of the way.

ABOUT THE EXPERT

Lilia Mucka Andrew Lilia Mucka Andrew, PhD, is a licensed clinical psychologist in the Division of Psychology and Behavioral Health at Children's National Hospital.

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